Forgiving is one of the most profound yet beautiful virtue of a Christian life and faith teachings.
It’s pillared as a Christian virtue and foundational for every Christian to live it, as it comes to us directly from the Lord, in “The Lord’s Prayer”
…And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
Why Being Christian is Practicing Forgiveness
Being Christian by faith is being like Christ not just in our beliefs and His teachings but also in the way that Christ lived.
Jesus and His living should be a model and a way of living for every “true Christian”.
If we just live as Christians without imbibing inside us and practicing the Lord’s teachings and virtues, we have our resembling in Christ only by namesake (Christians) and no real depth and discipleship of Jesus.
When we implement Jesus’ teachings in our lives, we let Jesus live and walk in our lives.
We not only believe Jesus’ teachings, we become all that is Jesus’ teachings.
Why forgive?
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
(Roman 5:8)
It began first with Jesus as He absorbed the cost of our sins and endured it all upon Himself, our hatred, our selfishness, and our wrongdoings.
He chose the cross to be His instrument of sacrifice in atonement for our sins.
We all are inspired and rightfully believe Jesus as Thomas, the apostle when doubted and Jesus appearance had him rightfully proclaim…
“My Lord and my God!” (John 20:28)
Yes that’s what Jesus is to each and every Christian.
Being Christian is understanding the immense debt of our sins that is forgiven or taken over by Jesus upon Himself, and this should humble us every Christian and motivate us to extend the same grace to others.
Remember what ‘God the Father’ said at the ‘Transfiguration of Jesus’ …
“This is my Son, whom I love. Listen to him!” (Mark 9:7)
Listen to Him, and what does God’s son says…
“To forgive not seven but seventy times seven.”
“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins”
(Matthew 6:14-15)
Also Jesus’ words when dying on the cross towards His oppressors and wrong-doers…
“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”
Jesus did not only preach forgiveness, He practiced and lived it till the end when dying on the cross.
A true Christian is the one who practices and lives the life and teachings of our dear beloved Jesus Christ.
Growing and Forgiving In Our Daily Living
Matthew 18:21-22
Peter: “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”
Jesus: “I tell you not seven times, but seventy-seven times”
Jesus in the above words is telling us that to forgive is to be endless times.
To forgive is not optional, it is woven into the very fabric of the Christian faith.
But knowing that forgiveness is important and at the core and actually practicing it in daily life are two different things.
In our lives it is indeed a struggle for us each to forgive as we hold onto hurts, the painful conversations, or we avoid people who have offended us.
We may say we have forgiven but our hearts remain bitter and bruised with un-forgiveness and the pain filled memories.
How can I outgrow this resentment and pardon the wrongdoings by others towards me in my daily life?
To begin with we need to grow in our understanding of what the Lord means about forgiveness, and the growth is not only in our understanding but a growth of our own oneself wherein we live a life of utmost peace and spiritual gratification.
Forgiveness is hard. We should not pretend that the hurt didn’t happen or allow yourself to be mistreated again.
We might be hurt but we need to have a heart that chooses to release someone from the debt of hurt they owe you and to hand the justice and the healing of oneself over to God.
It’s a daily practice, its choosing to face it every day and still not be affected.
What happens when you choose to forgive?
Now Jesus is present in your forgiveness.
His love is brought to life when we mend our ways by conversing with those who have hurt us.
The compassionate eyes of Jesus is at sight when we look with compassion and forgiveness towards those who have hurt and betrayed us.
The obedience towards Jesus words to forgive with passing time feels like freedom of mind and soul.
A weight filled heart feels like it weighs like a feather now.
Core remains that the unwillingness to forgive is a barrier in our relationship with God.
We cannot have a clutched fist holding on to other people wrongs and asking God to forgive and release us from our own wrongdoings. We cannot receive grace and mercy with a closed fist.
So asking God forgiveness for our own mistakes and wrongdoings, we will need to open our wrist (releasing people whom we’ve not forgiven) and bring those open palms now together in posture of prayer, asking God to forgive.
When armored with this weapon of virtue that is forgiveness, we will grow spiritually finding ourselves living a true Christian discipleship of Christ.
The Daily Art of Forgiveness: Practical Steps to Free Your Heart
Believing in forgiveness as an important Christian virtue and practicing it in our daily living can feel overwhelming and difficult.
How to practice this profound theological truth not as a single grand gesture, but as a meaningful ongoing habit would mean our lifestyle be molded around the following.
- Prayers
Don’t rush to force a feeling you don’t have.
Begin talking to God honestly. Talking to God, is praying.
You can pray, “Lord, I am hurt and angry. I don’t feel like forgiving, but you help me and guide this journey.
Please soften my heart, making it like yours that is filled with compassion and mercy.
Help me see this person and his situation through your eyes and knowledge. Let me live your will to love and forgive each other.
- Separate the Sin and the Sinner
This becomes crucial when we separate them both, as this person like yourself, was made in the image and likeness of God.
Choose to hate his wrongdoings and not him.
His outcome or behavior must be the effect of a frustration or difficulty in family, financial, or health in his life.
Pray for him allowing grace to flow towards the individual.
- Choice to Retaliate
Choice is yours. Eye for an eye or holding your horses.
Try to ignore or just let it pass, this moment. Patience has a price, a reward.
Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. (Romans 12:19)
- Speak the Truth to Yourself
You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
(Matthew 7:5)
Jesus words are a profound truth of the lives we each live.
We find our own doings perfect and judge others for their un-doings. We might be also hurting others but ignore them each to remember those that are aimed at us.
Also the parable of the unmerciful servant
(Matthew 18:21-35) is a stark reminder that we, who have been forgiven an unpayable debt by God, are called to forgive the smaller debts owed to us.
- Choose Blessing Over Cursing
You’re cursing might not affect the person whom you’ve cursed but it will surely be affecting your own peace and spiritual well-being.
You love Jesus and wish to be like him including His nature, He wouldn’t curse, why are you?
When these negative thoughts come, immediately interrupt them, bringing the Lord’s presence into the situation, thus guarding you further from doing wrong.
- Guard your Words
But the things that come out of a person’s mouth come from the heart, and these defile them. (Matthew 15:18)
Be on guard, your words can do the damage or escalate the conflict further.
Do not gossip or talk ill of the person who’ve hurt you.
Emphasize your hurt to nobody, you have a listener, a friend in Jesus, nobody else is required.
- Understanding the Process
Forgiveness is a process, a habit that we need to mold and practice every day of our lives.
Patience and resilience is what we need to muscle and pray for, to the Lord.
Forgiveness will be needed many a times for the same offence, as memories bring them alive, we need to let our thoughts be fooled by jumping over to the other pleasant thoughts of things happening in our lives against this one offend.
- Seek Reconciliation and Assistance
Try reconciling if there is an opportunity. Let the hurts be melted lest they become mountains of hate.
Also find assistance for your troubled mind and heart by confessing you’re unforgiving to a religious priest or a person of immense faith and divine wisdom.
You have many a problems being added each living day, try making your burden light as you journey in life.
True Witnesses of Forgiveness
Finally this life is once, never to repeat, let it not pass by in hatred and un-forgiveness.
In a world that thrives on grudges, hatred, and revenge, a life that practices radical forgiveness is a powerful light that shines to show the rays are not mine but of Christ.
Forgiving helps you to free not only the person of your wrath, but is also a freedom from anger and resentment for your own self and a lasting peace.
Maybe we need to save for the afterlife, and forgiving others is our barter for the currency in eternity.
As Christian we have received our own life so to give to others, so give love, forgiveness, peace and the Lord’s harmony.
Also pray to Jesus asking Him for strength and grace for ourselves and for others to love and forgive each other.